MEANING OR HAPPINESS? WHY NOT BOTH>

#happiness #meaning #purpose #trascendence #storytelling
“There’s more to life than being happy.”
So begins the “Money Matters” column by Wes Moss, published in the July 3, 2022 edition of The Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
Moss, who writes about happy retirees, says crafting a life that matters may be more important than happiness.
Moss cites the book “The Power of Meaning: Crafting a Life That Matters,” by Emily Esfahani Smith, who, Moss writes, has made it her mission to show how people eschew happiness for meaning.
Her four pillars are belonging, purpose, transcendence and storytelling, Moss writes.
Belonging involves having a relationship with a person who values who you are, not for how you look or what you are willing to do for them, Moss writes.
Purpose involves the reason a person gets out of bed in the morning. It may not be what others may consider a grand purpose, but if your job was your purpose, and now you are retired, you may need to find a new purpose, Moss writes.
Transcendence is the ability to be awed by something sacred. That something may not be sacred in the religious sense, but it may give you a sense of amazement, peace or stillness, Moss quotes the author.
Storytelling is the narrative you would write about you – what makes, or made, you the person you are today.
If your life has meaning, as you see it, you are not necessarily unhappy. Your purpose may indeed make you happy.
One who does little or nothing with his or her life may be content in their relaxation, but it may be debatable whether they are actually happy. Contentedness and happiness are not the same.
Most people have meaning in their lives. As Moss writes, that meaning may be different for everyone.
Most retirees have things they can do when they no longer work. Others may keep working well beyond their retirement age.
Whatever you find meaningful, chances are it will make you happy. Meaning and happiness may go together like hand and glove.
Just as most everyone has some meaning in their lives, everyone has a story. One’s story may not be as compelling as someone else’s, but his or her story has meaning not just to themselves, but others close to him or her.
In short, meaning and happiness can be dual goals. If one finds one, the other may soon follow.
Go for both.
Peter

LIFE AND PURPOSE

#life #purpose #MakeADifference
“The purpose of life is not to be happy – but to matter, to be productive, to have it make some difference that you lived at all.”
That quote, from Polish-born writer Leo Rosten, is one of many inspirational quotes and words in the book, “The Power of One: How One Person Can Make a Difference,” by BJ Gallagher and Steve Ruttenberg.
Let’s dissect the quote for a minute. If you work for someone else, perhaps you only want to be productive enough that the boss will pay you, and keep you around awhile.
If you work in a place in which only the owner of your company, and a few key executives, are getting rich, and you are not, that feeling is understandable. Why, after all, would you want to give your all so that they can take all – or at least the lion’s share.
Then, think about how much you matter to them. They may like your work, and may even think pretty highly of you. But how much are they going to sacrifice to make sure you don’t leave? Chances are, they see you as nothing more than a tool, a human resource. If they determine that you are costing them too much, or they need to reorganize and get rid of a few people, do you think they are going to care about what happens to you?
They may say nice things, but they will tell you they had to make some “tough decisions.” Some employers, undoubtedly, honestly feel bad about letting people go. But most of them aren’t going to take money out of their pockets to make sure there is money in yours.
Rosten, undoubtedly, was not thinking about employer-employee relations when he spoke those words.
He was referring to what’s inside YOU. Are you doing things in your world, if not at work, outside of it, that matter to others? Are you helping others, to borrow from the late Zig Ziglar, get what they want, thereby getting what you want?
It can be tough to matter. It can be difficult to be productive, generous, humble, even honest.
It can be hard to like everyone.
But Rosten’s words say that we should strive to be and do all those things.
Personal happiness, perhaps, is selfish in his mind. But without personal happiness, it will be a struggle to be the person you want to be – someone others see as valuable.
One does not have to be financially rich to give happiness. But one must strive to give what he can so others can succeed.
Some bosses want you to give, so they can take. You’d much rather give so that others can get and, by extension, you can get as well.
If you see yourself as a giving person, or are striving to be, but are looking for the best way you can give, visit www.bign.com/pbilodeau. You’ll see stories of people who became successful by finding the best way to give to others.
You can stay on the treadmill of a job, with a boss who doesn’t care about you. Certainly, if it pays well enough, you can sock enough money away to leave that job sooner rather than later. If you are lucky, you’ll be able to hang in as long as you want to.
But that may not be the way YOU want to be productive, to matter or to make a difference. You may have to look for the best way for you to do that.
Peter