#repent #forgive #180degreeturn
When we think of repentance, with think of the religious context of sinning and repenting.
Certainly, when we sin, it should give us pause.
But repentance has two parts, according to Rory Vaden, a self-discipline strategist and cofounder of Southwestern Consulting. He discussed repentance in an April 19, 2015, column in The Tennessean newspaper in Nashville.
The first part of repentance is apology. You’ve done something wrong and you beg forgiveness. But it’s the second part that we often forget about, Vaden says. That involves a 180-degree turn away from the actions from which you are repenting.
In other words, don’t just say you’re sorry and go back to doing the wrong you did. Addicts can apologize all day long, but unless they beat their addiction, they have truly not repented.
What could this mean for you? Perhaps you’ve done nothing “wrong,” yet your life does not seem right.
Perhaps no one but you notices. Perhaps YOU don’t even notice. Perhaps you’ve done everything you were told was right, yet something is missing.
That might make you ask yourself: if I’ve done everything the way I was told, why am I feeling this way? Why SHOULD I feel this way? What could possibly make me feel this way?
The feeling gnaws. One cannot control feelings. You believe there is something better out there for you, but you may not have a clue how to find it.
Yet, you rationalize, and tell yourself that mom, dad, your family and friends are still proud of you. In fact, you may have accomplished a great deal, yet you are still unfulfilled.
You may feel you have nothing to apologize to others for, for you have not sinned against them. They may even tell you how great you are, and that you are doing the right thing.
Still, you dream of better. Your family and friends may laugh at those dreams. They may encourage you to stop dreaming and get real.
Yet, your dreams are real. They come from deep inside. You know what you want, but not quite how to get it.
It may be the time to apologize to YOURSELF, then make that 180-degree turn in your life.
Your life may be like a big ship. It may not turn quickly. But it certainly can turn gradually.
The great news, if you have dreams you would like to fulfill, is there are many ways of doing so.
If you have big dreams, you may need to look for ways to fulfill them. For one of the best, visit www.bign.com/pbilodeau.
There, you will find others like you who had good lives, yet wanted more. Then, they found the way to get what they wanted, and helped others like them do the same.
The movie “Love Story” has a famous line that says “love means never having to say you’re sorry.” But telling yourself you are sorry, and fully repenting by making that 180-degree turn, can fulfill the need you have inside.
Your dreams are real. They can be fulfilled. Never, ever be sorry for dreaming.
Peter
Monthly Archives: April 2015
WHEN YOU FALL, GET BACK UP
#downisnotout #getbackup #anenemycalledaverage
“The most natural thing to do when you get knocked down is get back up.”
So says John Mason, executive coach and author, who wrote the book, “An Enemy Called Average: The Keys to Unlocking Your Dreams.”
There’s always something out there either trying to take you down, or that will take you down by accident.
Perhaps you are in a job, and all you can think about is trying to survive a bad manager, or that next reorganization.
Perhaps you have a friend or relative with a horrible disease, and all you can think about are the horrible things that would happen to you if YOU got the disease.
Whatever the situation, there is probably something good to come of it. You just may not be seeing it.
In fact, there may be something even better down the road that you are not seeing, or may not even be looking for.
But you have to start with getting back up if you are knocked down, or standing tall in the face of what appears to you to be a dismal future.
Something in each of us will tell us to give up when the chips are down. Some of us are naturally optimistic. Others have to work at it.
We all have to realize, too, that we need to always be looking. Not looking, as in window shopping. Not looking, as in browsing the Internet for a magic solution. Instead, we should realize the myriad opportunities out there that we may not know about. When someone brings one of those to you, check it out.
It’s OK to say, no, that’s not for me. But to say, no, without looking is to say, “woe is me,” and giving up.
As Mason says, “average” is your enemy. Greatness is your friend. And, great is something EVERYONE can be, even if your current circumstances will not get you there.
Certainly, your current circumstances may be putting food on your table, a roof over your head and giving you other necessities in life. Don’t hastily throw that away. But, when you are not helping someone else line his pocket, take a little time to find something that will line yours.
That doesn’t necessarily mean taking a second job, though many do. A second job usually means lining yet another person’s pocket. Make sure that whatever you do in life has something wonderful at the end for you and, as a bonus, allows you to help others find their own dreams.
OK, how does one find what one is looking for? First, one has to be actually looking. And, one has to have a dream big enough to want to not just look, but act when he finds what may give him that dream. For a great place to start looking, visit www.bign.com/pbilodeau. You may not see all your answers there, but you will see ingredients that could give you what you are looking for.
So, when you fall down, do you just lie there, cry, whine and say “woe is me.” Or, do you get up, dust off and carry on? Do what Mason says is the natural thing. Don’t let what may take you down, keep you there. Get up, look around, know that the future is bright, if you make it so.
Peter
PERSISTENCE PAYS OFF
#persistence #don’tquit #don’tgiveup
If you know what you have is good, stick with it.
Don’t give up, even after setbacks.
Of course, if you find that what you have has something to be desired, try something else.
Tom Black discussed persistence in an April 5, 2015, column in The Tennessean newspaper in Nashville.
Black writes that he tells every salesperson he meets: “Persistence and determination are omnipotent.”
He tells the story of Ron Wayne, the third founder of Apple Computer with Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak. Wayne sold his Apple shares after the first year for $300. Had he held on, he’d be one of the richest men in the world today – worth more than $40 billion.
Wayne obviously knew he had something good. But, as he admitted, “my whole life has been a day late and a dollar short,” Black quotes him.
There are many other stories out there of successful people either starting with nothing and becoming successful, or becoming successful, going broke and becoming successful again.
Most people either don’t become successful, or settle for mediocrity in their lives. Perhaps they were encouraged to crave security, do what you need to do to make a living, so that no one thinks you are a failure.
Certainly, most of these folks work hard. Some of them might even work too hard. But something is missing from the equation. Usually, it has to do with goals and dreams.
Each day, ask yourself why you do what you do. Is doing what you do going to give you want you want from life? If so, keep doing it. If not, look for something good. When you find it, stick with it and pursue it with persistence, no matter what happens to deter you, and no matter what people say about what you are doing.
Mind you, most people would advise you not to quit your day job to pursue your dream. The good news is, you won’t have to, if you find the right vehicle. If you find it, eventually you may be able to quit that day job, escape mediocrity and do something more than just make a living.
The ingredients for such a life starts with realizing you could do better than what you are settling for. Once that hits you, find what you REALLY want to do. Start pursuing it part time. If success doesn’t come quickly, don’t give up. Be persistent.
Hone your persistence by doing something related to your goal every day. That doesn’t mean using every waking hour off your day job to pursue your goal, though, for some, it’s that important. But, look for activities in your life that you can cut, or eliminate, to give you the time for your goal.
If you are not finding the vehicle to help you reach your goal, there are many out there, if you are willing to look, and know where to look. For one of the best, visit www.bign.com/pbilodeau.
In short, find your goal, find your vehicle, devote time out of your daily life to it and eventually reap the rewards. Those rewards may not be instant, and they may not come without setbacks. But if you know that what you have is good, and are persistent, you’ll eventually see results.
Staying power is lacking in most people. If you don’t believe that, ask Ron Wayne.
Peter
HOW GREAT ARE YOU?
#greatness #self-confidence #doingrightbyothers
There’s a difference between self-confidence and greatness.
Great people never proclaim their greatness. But others may. Self-confident people express confidence to themselves, and just show it to others.
Don Yaeger, a former associate editor for Sports Illustrated magazine, has interviewed thousands of great people in his career. In his book, “What Makes the Great Ones Great,” he lists 16 characteristics of greatness. They are: hating to lose more than wanting to win, appreciating the values of association, placing faith in a higher power, having contagious enthusiasm, preparing for all possibilities, having no off-season, visualizing victory, using adversity as fuel, being a responsible risk-taker, knowing how and when to make adjustments, becoming the ultimate teammate, being motivated by more than money, doing right by others, living with integrity, being a role model and creating a well-rounded legacy.
We won’t focus specifically on all 16 here, but we will draw out what a great person, defined as a person capable of doing something great as determined by others, based on Yaeger’s characteristics.
This person has drive. He or she is capable of motivating others by allowing others to observe how he or she acts.
The person gives and does for others enthusiastically, without expecting anything in return. He or she goes home each night knowing he or she has done the best possible.
He or she knows the goal and knows the drill. He or she doesn’t say to others, “Try again. I’ll know what I’m looking for when I see it.” If what’s produced is not up to standard, he or she says exactly what needs to be done to make it so.
This person won’t criticize you. He or she will care about you for who you are. He or she will do all possible to make YOU the best YOU can be. Very likely, personal reward will come his or her way, though that’s not the goal.
This person knows bad things will happen. But his or her strength comes from turning bad to good, using whatever it takes and staying with what works. He or she will look to others to find the how, but will have a firm grasp on why.
He or she doesn’t have to be well educated on paper, but will read a lot of the right things and learn a lot from others. He or she is not content to be content. He or she not only wants what he or she wants, but also wants it for others.
Not only does this person completely understand right from wrong, he or she does the right thing, even without thinking about it, and when no one is looking.
He or she is the same person among family, friends or strangers. He or she doesn’t ask anyone to follow him or her, the way, say, a dictator might. People follow him or her BECAUSE of who they are. No duress, no distress, just success for all.
We all have potential for greatness. We all have potential to achieve all that we want. We all can find the best role models to emulate. Yet, not all of us do what we are capable of. If you want more than contentment and are searching for a vehicle to give it to you, visit www.bign.com/pbilodeau. You’ll see people enthusiastically doing what they need to do, to get what they want.
Don’t let others, or circumstances, stop you. Achieve greatness. Get the help you need and follow what the best are doing. Do right by others. Bring others with you as you achieve. Know why you are doing it, and let reward come to you.
Peter